FEAR-OF-UNKNOWN

How to Conquer Your Fears

 Courage is the first of human virtues because it makes all others possible,” – Aristotle

Fear steals potential and stomps out dreams for no reason. Why do we let the chance for something bad to happen to ensure that nothing incredible ever does?

Let’s not torture ourselves by imaginary, potential failures. We’ll want to step back to the comfort zone where nothing progresses.

Suppose Harriet Tubman was too afraid to lead the slaves to freedom? Who else would do it? I don’t think a strong, healthy, young man would have the courage to do what she did.

What if Einstein never attempted to answer such challenging problems in physics? He hated school and at 15 he was told he should just leave, and Einstein agreed.

He attempted to get into college but failed the entrance exam. So, he went back to high school then eventually got a degree. But to his dismay, his discovered that a degree doesn’t equal a guaranteed job. No ones would hire him so he worked as a patent clerk.

After so much struggle and failure, it’d be easy for him to believe he would never amount to much. He could have thought he world would mock him for attempting to solve complex physics problems. The key here is: he did it anyway.

 

So, let’s do this!

1. Get to know your fear

Unfortunately, most people don’t know the meaning for their fear, the benefits of it, or how they should use it. Yes, you can use fear as a tool to breakthrough suffering and become a courageous, person.

For over a year I’ve been afraid to show my family my blog wisdom4freedom. I’ve seen people disown a family member because of differences in beliefs.

I love my relatives regardless of what they believe. But, I knew it would hurt if they didn’t want to speak to me again because of mine.

I felt like I was being dishonest and I can’t live like that. So eventually I told myself, “Sheryl, if they turn their backs on you for being your true self, then why would you want to keep that negativity in your life? You are the only one who has to live your life and they have to accept it or move on.”  So, last week, I posted wisdom4freedom.com on my Facebook where all my family could see and I waited.

You know what happened? They liked it. Granted, they haven’t read all of the articles but I feel tremendous relief just to get it over with. I chose freedom and it still feels great.

If you don’t conquer your fear, it will grow till it’s almost too massive to handle.

It’s ridiculous to be afraid of imaginary things that have not happened. Even if those fears happen, it’s usually not as bad as we thought it would be.

One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn’t do.” —Henry Ford

 

2. Think logically about your fear

If your fears are causing you to hate or want to hurt others then I’m sorry to tell you, you’ve been programmed by someone. They want you to hate/hurt certain people because of their own insecurities and false beliefs.

German citizens in WWII were programmed to hate Jews. How did this happen? By repeatedly exposing them to hateful propaganda.

Chances are the German people scoffed at such ridiculous claims about Jews. They probably had friends and co-workers who were Jewish. But, after repeatedly hearing lies and reading propaganda, their subconscious believed it.

Our subconscious mind is programmed by repetition. It runs our behaviors and tries to scare us back into our comfort zone. It isn’t some malicious entity that strives to sabotage our lives. It’s trying to keep us safe at all times. That’s one of its jobs.

But it’s very naive and it doesn’t know how to use logic. It can only communicate with us via emotions and images. You’re not a robot. This is your life and now you have the wisdom to grab it by the horns before someone else does.

 

3. Understand the fear

Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less.” —Marie Curie

What we fear, we don’t understand. We don’t understand because we avoid them.

Gather the courage to sit down and write out what fears have held you back.

  • What have you always dreamed of doing?
  • Why haven’t you done it?
  • Think of the ideal version of yourself.
  • What do you need to overcome for you to become that person?

Write down your fear, or think about it. When you try to ignore fear, it grows. When you face it, it shrinks. When you do what scared you, it vanishes.

 

4. What’s the Worst that Could Happen?

What’s the worst case scenario if you did what scared you? Don’t run from it, that will be your first reaction. It’ll be uncomfortable but this is necessary.

Do you want to try to get a better job or move up in your company? Then the worst that could happen is they say no and you might beat yourself down. You could then apply for that better job elsewhere.

Do you have social anxiety? If so then you can imagine going to a job and everyone makes fun of you. That would suck but you won’t die or be physically harmed. Eventually, people will warm up to you and everything will be cool.

If the worst happened what would be the core pain you’d like to avoid?

Failure? Loneliness? Ridicule? Sadness? Hurt feelings? Lose money? Lost relationships?

Now, imagine that the worst has happened. But, instead of freaking out, accept it and plan what your next steps should be.

The remarkable thing is that as soon as you stop resisting the worst possible outcome, you’ll relax, your mind will clear, and your ability to deal with the situation will improve dramatically.” – Brian Tracy

 

5. Make a Plan of Attack

Making a plan to overcome your fear takes courage. You will need to force yourself to sit there with your fear until you find the solution. Be determined to not have a half-lived life.

I have learned over the years that when one’s mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear.” —Rosa Parks

 

6. Now Do What you Fear and See What Happens

Do the thing we fear, and death of fear is certain.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

Finally, you will need to do what scares you. So stop worrying about your fear (or ignoring it) and just do it. Force yourself to do it immediately, without thinking. If you stop to think then your mind will stop you from trying. Doing something that you fear is essential to growth and for having a fulfilling life. Do you really want to sacrifice the success you deserve for an imagined problem?

 

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